seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
