Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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