Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
