did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
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