Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
