your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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