u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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