i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
