wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize