David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
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