dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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