he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
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