So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize