Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Randomize
