he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
