hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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