What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I looked at my own cervix.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
