No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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