Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
