thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
