dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
