everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
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