She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Randomize