just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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