another moral hangover. fuck.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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