So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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