And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.