i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize
