worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
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There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
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I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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