8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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