What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
