they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
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I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
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I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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