Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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