And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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