But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
