Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize