If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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