I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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