i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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