nut hugger
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
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