no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver