just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
