he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
