Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
