no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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