That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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