its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
