oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
