after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
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Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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