so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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