C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize