You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
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A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
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I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.